Selma's note: This happens a little while after "Because You are With Me" and features one of our encounters between Alex and Moira. Alex, of course, wanted advice and Moira was happy to help.

Shipbound 1
by Selma McCrory and Deb Cebulski
copyright 2000

Moira looks up. "Come in dear--I've just put the kettle on." She gathers a tray of tea cakes and places it before him. Moira makes the tea and pours cups for both of them. It's clear that the talking won't begin until the tea is done, so Alex bites the bullet and drinks it.

Watching Moira carefully, he tries to down the tea at the pace she's set, trying not to look rude despite his dislike of the drink. He knows that Moira would bite his head off if he tried to get help without observing proper procedure.

Moira graces Alex with a minute smile and nod as she sips her tea. After the cup is done and cakes are passed around, she settles back in her chair and looks at him. "Now, dear. I know you didn't come here to coddle an old lady and watch her drink tea. What's wrong?"

Alex ponders how to explain the situation in his head, and comes up with the simplest explanation. "Mari."

Moira sighs. "Poor lad. Our Mari is an easy person to love, but you're going to be traveling a hard road."

"I know," Alex replies, looking a little forlorn. "I just don't understand what to do, or how to help her. She certainly isn't talking to Ra'das, although I've tried to get her to talk to him... I thought I knew her, but I don't."

Moira laughs softly. "Son, I've known her all her life and there are times I don't know her. Don't let that discourage you." She looks him straight in the eye. "Despite all this, do you love her?"

"Yes. I probably wouldn't be here if I didn't. From the beginning, I had kind of a crush on her... then, a couple of month ago, I found it was mutual. And then I found out what she was... that was three months ago, and she's always been more worries about her heritage than I've ever been. I love her for herself, not for what she is or isn't." Alex fiddles with some of his food, looking back at Moira. "It hurts me not to be able to help her."

Moira smiles at him. "Son, if you love her that much, you'll be able to help her somehow, and I'll do what I can to help you."

"Well... I was hoping you could give me some advice. I feel like I just haven't known her long enough to get her to stop... I guess loathing herself is the right term. She just keeps stomping off in the wrong direction, despite everything I try to do!"

Moira's smile broadens. "With our Mari it's always one step forward, two back. Has she told you about her childhood?"

"Other than it was pretty happy and she learned to hack, pick locks, and hotwire cars, no," Alex says, a little ruefully. "I got more bits and pieces when I didn't know about her than she'll tell now. And most of what I do know is overheard from when she was talking to her patients. I must have heard what it was like to move into a house from an apartment about half a dozen times."

Moira's smile fades. "Part of her childhood was wonderful. The rest of it was spent in hiding, on the run from the Taelons. That had its effect on her. She could never, ever reveal her full self to the world. If she did, she and her parents would die. Her parents and I taught her to pretend that she was just a normal human child. We taught her too well. Now she's totally fixated on being human--and ONLY human--instead of accepting her Kimera side."

"Ra'das did something that I don't think helped very much," Alex said. "Every time it seems like she's going to accept some part or another, something hurts her. Then she goes back to the way she was, and it's near-impossible to get her to do it again. It's like she needs someone to block the exit that she can't charge through."

Moira leans back in her chair, frowning slightly. "I think that simply being here is going to accomplish that blocking you wanted, dear. She's stuck here and she can't return to Earth--at least, not in the foreseeable future. For all her talk of escaping, she can't go back there. The Taelons and the police have the names, descriptions, retinal and DNA scans for Liam and all of his children, and they would find her. She's going to have to stay and adjust to living here with her father's people. Eventually, she will have to accept her Kimera side. She won't really have a choice." She sighs deeply and pours another cup of tea.

"Erm... no offence, but she is kinda stubborn. I feel if there's a way to get around that, she'll find it," Alex replied, feeling sheepish at the implied insult. "Marianne is very... creative."

Moira's eyes twinkle as she laughs. "Don't apologize, lad. She came by it honestly. I think Mari will find that there's only so far her creativity will take her. No matter where she goes, no matter what she does, she will still be her father's daughter. She's a smart lass, and I'm sure she'll accept this at some point." Her eyes dimmed as she looked at Alex. "Do you think you can persevere until then?"

"I hope so," Alex sighs. "I've got Ra'das, so I'm not totally alone. I think I've accepted him better than she has. Reminding her of her ancestry only infuriates her. I know when she's talked to you, because I inevitably hear about that."

Moira smiles slyly. "I'm not surprised, lad. Beacause of Liam's rapid growth, I never had the chance to bond with him in childhood. In many ways, Mari is my firstborn grandchild and I love her dearly. Because of that love, I always tell her the truth, no matter what. She may be angry because of it, but deep down she knows I'm right."

Alex snickers, and then sobers. "If she knows that, then she's not letting it get through her skull. She must have been quite interesting growing up, but now she's got a lead skull."

Moira shakes her head. "Trust me, son. She's heard what we've said--she just doesn't want to believe it. She knows she's wrong about not being Kimera every time she mates. She's mated twice in less than a year. She's more Kimera than she wants to believe."

"Kimera resilience. It's probably one of the few things she will acknowledge, actually." Moira nods. "Give her time--she'll acknowledge the rest." She rises and begins to stack the tea things on the tray. "You're doing fine dear--and I'm proud to have you in the family." She sets the tray in her kitchen nook and picks up a book from a side table. "Tell me dear--are you interested in genealogy?"