This is yet another Greer fanfic. It contains mild spoilers for the stories "Never Alone" and "Hoppers".
*2063*
I've always liked the sunset over Fairbanks.
I don't know the city anymore, but the sunsets are the same. There are minute differences, but I can't tell whether it's the polution or just the difference in a child's perception.
I haven't been back to Fairbanks in eighty years, and the last time I was here, it was for my father's funeral. Then my mother's.
Fairbanks makes me feel at home, no matter how it's grown or changed. This is where I was found, where I grew up, where I went to school. Where my life changed.
I'm told I was found in this park. Someone had wrapped me up warmly and left me on a park bench. Dangerous to do in December. But my kind is hardy. I survived.
Come to think of it, this was also the park where I first saw Antony fight, where I first became aware of Immortals, and where I met Helen. Where I decided to be a Watcher. And my future went from there.
I think, at last, I don't regret being in the Watchers. I don't regret leaving them, either. It hurt for the longest time, but somehow the hurt went away.
And if it wasn't for the Watchers, I would have never met Michael. My poor, dead husband who gave me a reason to live. I'll never forget the party in Dallas that we both ended up at.
The sunsets in Dallas aren't as pretty as the ones here.
And if it weren't for Michael, I would have never met my other reason to live. The Tomorrow People. There were only four when I met them. Now it's more than four hundred. Maybe close to a thousand. I've lost track.
The Tomorrow People gave me something to cling onto. I'm their archivist. I maintain their geneologies, keep track of who they are. And they know me, and are not scared of me.
I was scared when I became Immortal. Watchers are not supposed to become Immortal. The Organization is supposed to have safeguards. Well, thanks to me, they are better now.
And I have to thank the Watchers. Without my training as a researcher, I could not have done what I do for the Tomorrow People. And without that, I would not be alive.
So much to live for. There are now fourth generation Tomorrow People. All the kids know me. They grow up, and they can't let go. I became a pacifist because of them, and they protect me from the consequences.
I can still recall Adam's smile as I held Theona. Lisa getting married, and no longer avoiding her powers. Snips of memory flash by, of Theona, then Michael, then Marmaduke, then Angela, Alain, Claryssa, so many others. Playing. Growing up. Breaking out, becoming adults, having children. Growing old. Dying, finally.
I envy them their dying. Always have, always will. Oh, I can die too, but I'd rather die of cancer like Michael than the awkward death that is beheading.
Michael is dead. He died twelve years ago. Didn't even live to see the first two TP marry each other.
And what do I have left? A lot of people who respect me. A lot that I know. And one foster son.
Michael didn't live to meet Teague, either. Michael didn't see Vanessa Skye flip head over heels for him. Nor did he get to see the wedding. It was just before we left Sacramento.
Sacramento has its charms, but I still love the sunsets over Fairbanks.
We married in Sacramento. Left there. Lived in London as much as we could. Moved around. Dear Mikey, Michael's namesake, moved with us. He Watched me and still managed to have a pair of daughters. He didn't live to see Melinda and Marm's daughter, Disa Misabel Damon.
He isn't here to see their second on its way.
And yet I envy him.
I envy all of them. People would take Immortality without a second thought if it were offered them. I wish I didn't have this sword digging in my ribs. I wish I could see a grey hair and know I didn't dye it. And, yes, sometimes I wish I could get cancer.
But this is my path. As a friend once told me, "we can't change what we are". No, we can't. We just do the best we can. Live. Love. Hope. Survive.
Survive into the second chapter of my book, my second century. As I stand in this park, I know that I could not have seen my destiny.
I now know it well. Even in the dark.
-end